Review: The Death of Robin Hood

The idea of a revisionist take on a classic hero has been around for almost as long as the heroes themselves. The Death of Robin Hood doesn't bring a lot that's new to the table; even the focus on storytelling - the role of legend in shaping and warping real people's lives - was a pretty large part of Unforgiven a generation ago. But even with this kind of revisionist take, the point is that the story continues. Every new film gives Robin Hood a chance to live on.

On the side of a bleak and barren hill, Robin Hood (Hugh Jackman) lives, waiting for people seeking revenge for his countless crimes to show up and (try to) kill him. It seems that being a bandit was a license to rob and kill without pity; his good deeds (and Maid Marion) were all made up, while his brutal decades-long murder spree was wiped from the legend.

One thing that wasn't fictional was Little John (Bill Skarsgard), who turns up with a problem. A decade or so ago, he murdered a man, stole his identity, and took his farm and wife. It all worked out fine - the wife loved him, they had a daughter - but the locals finally cottoned on, threw him out, and claimed it all for themselves. Now he wants it back, and he needs Robin's help.

Robin says sure - he's basically just hoping to find someone tough enough to kill him anyway - and a series of extremely violent and somewhat horrifying murders take place. Robin isn't killed but he comes pretty close, and Little John ships him off to an island priory, where the woman in charge (Jodie Comer) is a renowned healer with a tragic past of her own.

Things progress from there, though not in the way you might expect. Robin does heal and becomes the protector of the island in a fashion, but his method of staving off the expected carnage shows him gradually growing in a way unrelated to his (already pretty impressive) skills with the bow and knife. Even on the island, he can't escape his past; his only way forward is to embrace it, for good or ill.

Jackman has form in this area, with Logan being a somewhat similar take on Wolverine. Visually his Hood is a scruffier, shaggier character; Jackman's performance suggests someone forced down a path he'd rather have not chosen, his killing skills an asset in a way that his other talents (he's a natural storyteller; in the few scenes where he gets to use that talent Jackman dials up the warmth) could never be in a violent world driven by revenge.

Unsurprisingly the tone is dour and brooding, especially early on, set in a bleak and windswept landscape that has little to do with Sherwood Forest. This grim setting undercuts the drama somewhat; this isn't a place where the thrilling tales of Robin Hood would seem even remotely plausible to the struggling inhabitants. A stirring tale of adventure this is not.

Strong performances all round (including Australian actor Murray Bartlett as the island's leprous orchard keeper) do eventually pay off, and thanks to a story that slowly struggles towards the light this becomes more than the one note slaughterfest it initially promises to be. Jackman's take is about as far from the swashbuckling hero as you can get, but a connection of sorts to the legend eventually surfaces; a good story always wins out in the end.

- Anthony Morris 

Review: Toy Story 5

Does the world need another Toy Story movie? It's a bit of an odd question, as you'd be hard pressed to name any movies the world actually needs (well, aside from safety ones from the 70s about not putting your hand in a blender). But with the Toy Story story having pretty much wrapped up with the third film, and the fourth being generally seen as a tolerable but pointless extension, what hope is there for number five?

While your mileage may vary, Toy Story 5 does make a reasonable case for its existence, thanks largely to two things: Jessie (Joan Cusack) steps up into the lead role, with Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen) now the sidekick and Woody (Tom Hanks) as Special Guest Star, and the story is about something shiny and new.

That new thing being the world of screens, which we're informed fairly early on has led to the end of the Age of Toys. Well, not Jesse and the rest of the supporting cast (who this time are barely more than cameos), thanks to their current owner Bonnie (Scarlett Spears) being built different from the average screen-addled pre-teen.

This does have a downside when it comes to connecting with the other kids (fans of the classic Pixar approach to emotional devastation will be glad to know this gets in early and hard with Bonnie sadly asking her parents why nobody will be friends with her). Her parents have the solution; a kid friendly tablet named Lilypad (Greta Lee), on which she can play games with the kids from her dance class via "the pond".

Jesse is horrified at the idea of Bonnie just randomly fishing for friends. The cool kids will eat her alive; Jesse's own unresolved trauma at being cast aside by her first owner has, of course, nothing to do with it. Lilypad's sassy attitude doesn't help matters much, and soon the war is on - and in war, the newest technology always has an edge.

Jesse calls in Buzz, who's out in the world working alongside Bo Peep (Annie Potts) rescuing discards tossed aside as screens re-order toy society. Plans go awry, toys get lost, Jesse ends up back on her old farm teaming up with a bunch of obsolete electronic toys in need of a recharge, and are screens really the problem or is it just that little kids can be jerks?

Meanwhile, a shipping container of all-new Buzz Lightyear toys has been washed up (and broken open) on a tropical isle. They come to life, break out of their packaging, get busy surviving, and find meaning in their lives: find Star Command. But what does their quest have to do with the rest of the story? 

It's a solid mix of heart-wrenching emotional drama for toys and kids (tears will be shed) alongside some well-crafted physical action, each amplifying the other while it all moves along at a bouncy pace. Bumping Woody to a supporting character (the running joke is that he's now seen as past it, with a bald patch repeatedly deployed for humorous effect) helps to avoid the feeling of fan service, while Buzz (the original) is largely fumbling around trying to figure out a way to propose to Jesse.

The verdict on screen time is surprisingly nuanced - there's no bad way to play, just bad people to play with - and using your imagination is prized no matter what. There's a number of sequences animated in a looser style showing the stories the kids have come up with for their toys that are entertainingly bonkers; fancy costume balls and extravagant weddings are mashed up with bomb plots and murder in a way that makes playtime seem a lot of fun.

The series hammers home hard the idea that toys should be passed on when the owners grow tired of them, which feels like a counter to the argument that the Toy Story series should have ended a decade ago. And - as the film almost but not quite acknowledges - the idea of living toys that watch over kids and know what's best for them is moving ever closer to high-tech reality. Enjoy your imagination while you can.

- Anthony Morris 

 

Review: Disclosure Day

Disclosure Day is a movie about aliens in much the same way as your average Mission: Impossible movie was about whatever was on the USB everyone was rushing around trying to grab. Aliens are what drives the story, but they're not what the story is about. Unfortunately, while the M:I movies eventually figured out that what they were about were insane stunts that were fun to watch, Disclosure Day is often about running around a lot while only moving forward a little.

That said, being directed by Steven Spielberg does mean that much of that running around is firmly entertaining, and every now and again he throws in a quality action sequence to perk things up. But for much of the running time this falls between two (or more) stools, as the plot never quite comes together while never really using its slipshod nature to throw in some entertaining curveballs.

Half the story is about whistleblower Daniel (Josh O'Connor, taking it seriously), on the run with a treasure trove of data covering decades of alien encounters. With him is Jane (Eve Hewson), his girlfriend who proves to be both asset and liability; pursuing him is a corporate entity known as Wardex, led by a very hands-on Noah Scanlon (Colin Firth), who aside from running a giant organisation and having dismissive meetings with military top brass is also the only one who can successfully use the alien tech they have stashed away.

The other half of the story is about weatherwoman Margaret (Emily Blunt, keeping it light), who is hoping to move up to real reporting but who seems a little frazzled for that kind of responsibility. Then she becomes multi-lingual, develops the ability to sense - and solve - other people's issues, starts speaking a weird alien language live on air, and ends up in the sights of Wardex. Fortunately her new psychic skills turn out to be an advantage in these situations.

They run around a lot across rural America before their paths cross, and there's even more running after that. Being on the run does get a little repetitive, though the bursts of action spice things up and keep the tension relatively high. More of a problem is the lack of any real menace from Wardex, though Scanlon does get one pretty creepy scene of long-distance psychic manipulation, which suggests a much scarier and more paranoid film then the one we get.

There's also the occasional discussion as to whether revealing the truth about aliens is a good idea. This is largely couched in religious terms, where the big question is "what happens if aliens replace God in human society?" Even the characters in the film don't really take this seriously as a proposition, though some aliens are tortured and die off-camera for our sins. 

It's not a problem that this ends up being much more about the characters than the aliens. It is a problem that it ends up being about these characters, as for plot reasons their backgrounds are largely hidden for much of the film in a way that makes them feel a little thinly sketched. The performances are all good (Blunt is often in comedy mode, and is the better for it), but for a character-based drama as this turns out to largely be, these characters are lacking.

With the alien side of things being surprisingly traditional, the most interesting material here is on the fringes. The world is moving to the brink of war but it's only glimpsed here and there; the alien encounters are dream-like and fragmentary; Margaret's boyfriend Jackson (Wyatt Russell) is the most likable character here but his role diminishes as things progress. 

Oh, and the big ending is the one point where this film takes a big swing; it's also something you could cut out (or just end the film right before it happens) and not really change the story we've just been told.

President Nixon getting drunk and wanting to impress a 50s TV star with a freezer full of alien corpses is pretty funny though.

- Anthony Morris 

 

Review: Scary Movie

You know what you're going to get with a Scary Movie. That's not to say they can't fail at what they do - it's more that at least part of the joke is that the bar is set pretty low. There's a gag early on that a character stops texting someone and calls them because the audience for these films can't read. Seems a bit harsh, but it did get a laugh.

Loosely wrapped around a "somehow, Ghostface returned" plot lifted from pretty much any one of the Scream movies (their recent revival goes some way towards explaining why this series is back) are a bunch of references to other horror movies, some of which are actually funny. A fatality-packed Final Destination amusement park, a line that a situation would be just like the one in It Follows only nobody saw that movie and the premise didn't really make sense, a riff on The Substance; you get the idea.

The plot barely hangs together - the people who are brutally murdered tend to stay dead, but that's about it for continuity - but it does organise itself around a recent trend in legacy horror: there's the original cast (in this case Marlon and Shawn Wayans are back, plus Anna Farris, Regina Hall, and Dave Sheridan as Deputy Doofy), and there's the new generation, which includes Wednesday Adams parody Tuesday (Savannah LeeNassif), Sara (Olivia Rose Keegan) and the not at all suspicious Jack (Cameron Scott Roberts).

The parodies here reach beyond horror - there's an animated K-Pop Demon Hunters sequence and a decent send-up of Michael focusing on another member of the Jackson family, to name two - and they vary from barely a reminder that the original exists to occasionally insightful. 

There's also a lot of stoner jokes, gay jokes, Black jokes, Covid jokes, DEI hire jokes, and so on, none of which are all that shocking or offensive. Plus there's a trans character who is treated - for a Scary Movie - with a surprising amount of respect (the only joke is how, after transitioning, he is more of a dude than the other dudes). Men with micropenises do not receive the same level of support.

But the whole deal here is quantity over quality, and with a run time barely over 80 minutes before the credits (there are scenes during the end credits, but nothing at the end of the end credits) this packs in enough that you can't really complain about the size of the portions. 

So is it any good? Not really, but that's beside the point. This is designed to be seen with a large audience that's committed to reacting to what's on the screen. Groans, boos, shocked gasps, befuddlement, it's all good. The occasional laugh? Yeah, you might get a couple of those too.

- Anthony Morris 

Review: Masters of the Universe

There's not a lot to work with in the Masters of the Universe, uh, universe. There are good guys and bad guys, a handful of locations - one good, one evil, one they can fight over - and pretty much the closest any of them get to having a character is a rip-off from superhero comics where a nerdy guy turns into the hero by saying some magic words. So this is a movie we can safely sit out? Not so fast.

Taking not so much a leaf as a whole entire tree grown from the Barbie playbook, this take on the toy franchise is not only a solid (if a touch generic) action-adventure tale, but a story that interrogates exactly what the popularity of the toys means to the audience. Is a muscle-bound, scantily-clad sword-wielder a real role model? Is his nerdy, sensitive alter-ego more the way to go? Why not both?

Our story begins on He-Man's homeworld, where the eight year-old Prince Adam (Artie Wilkinson-Hunt) is failing at being trained to be a deadly warrior by Man-at-Arms (Idris Elba), much to the displeasure of his father (James Purefoy). Why all the pressure? The answer soon arrives in the form of Skeletor (Jared Leto) and his army of freaks and thugs - plus magic user Evil-Lyn (Alison Brie). 

When Castle Greyskull is breached, only the quick work of the Sorceress (Morena Baccarin) sends Adam and the Sword of Power through a portal to Earth and safety. Only he loses the sword, and spends the next fifteen-odd years growing up to be a sensitive HR manager (complete with He/Him pronouns) who's also kind of a creepy weirdo obsessed with swords and living in a room covered with drawings of action figures (it's his way of remembering the people from his past).

All the Earth stuff is really just to establish that the adult Adam (Nicolas Galitzine) is a bit of a dork. So when he finally finds the sword, and touching it alerts everyone to where it is, he's far from ready to deal with what happens next. It's only when his now grown-up classmate Teela (Carmila Mendes) arrives to bring him home that he starts to get a grip on things beyond his sword - and even then he's far from ready to deal with a home planet now ruled by Skeletor.

Chances are if anyone's thought of a He-Man joke in the last few decades, it'll turn up here (memes included). It turns out the embarrassing names of all the classic toys - Fisto and Ram Man, to name two - were given to them by Adam as a child on Earth; he didn't know their real names, and they're not pleased to hear what he now calls them, even if he is their biggest fan. 

On the evil side of the street, Skeletor is both menacing and extremely camp, an actual threat that gives the movie real stakes while also being a preening egomaniac constantly frustrated by his loser underlings. Most of all, he's fun; we might not see Leto's face, but this is his best performance in ages. Though he's a first amongst equals here, with strong performances across the board bringing this collection of action figures to life.

None of the individual elements here are a stand-out, but taken as a whole this is an enormously entertaining and wildly satisfying romp that respects the original IP while also treating it as a comedy goldmine. It's a film for all ages (parents might want to come up with an explanation for the multiple 'Fisto' jokes) that's big on both action and comedy while still managing to have a few things to say about growing up obsessed with action figures.

It also makes Trap Jaw an actual threat, which is pretty impressive in and of itself. C'mon, he's named Trap Jaw!

- Anthony Morris 

Review: Backrooms

 

As a viral YouTube hit with multiple videos and a growing amount of lore, “The Backrooms” was an obvious candidate for the big screen. Well, obvious until you stopped to think about it. How are you going to make a successful movie out of creeping people out by slowly wandering around a bizarre maze that’s mostly just a weird take on the service areas hidden from the public at stadiums and hotels?

“Add characters” is the obvious answer, even if it threatens to defuse the atmosphere the series relies on. Fortunately, Clarke (Chiweltel Ejiofor) has a lot going on even before things get spooky. A former architect now running a half empty furniture warehouse (where he also lives), his sessions with therapist Mary (Renate Reinsve) reveal a man filled with anger who sees being alone as his natural state.

After a spate of strange electrical issues at the store, he discovers a… weak spot in the wall, which he can pass through and enter a sodium-lit mirror of the real world, filled with items sinking into the floor and walls that don’t make sense. It’s strange, but nothing more than that, right?

Oh wait, right at the start of the film we saw a found footage sequence involving someone in a biohazard suit hurrying through the same creepy location, only he was scared out of his wits that something bad was going to happen. And then it did. There’s something roaming the backrooms and it doesn’t seem friendly.

The horror here is balanced between a bunch of jump scares and chase sequences in the backrooms - all effectively handled by first time director Kane Parsons (creator of the original YouTube shorts) - and the wider mystery of what might be going on in an endless space that seems to clumsily mimic the memories of those who stumble into it.

The unsettling vibe of endless bland corridors and rooms is what makes the concept work, and this fits enough of that in to keep things faithful while building on the concept just enough to make it satisfying as a stand alone film. Are the backrooms a reflection of the recesses of our mind? Or some place trying to copy and replace reality itself? Maybe it’s neither, or both, or something else.

For those who have been following the YouTube saga, you’re not left out.  This is pretty much a parallel tale - this is happening here, the YouTube stuff is over there, and the Backrooms are endless so there’s plenty of room for both. You don’t need to be up with the mythos to get what’s happening on the occasions when it does intrude, but it’s a nice little Easter egg if you are.

This is the kind of story where less (explanation) is more, and Parsons knows we’re here to be creeped out, not learn a lesson or be handed an extended metaphor for AI generated content. It’s basically a two hander set in a terrifyingly alien yet superficially mundane location where curiosity is just one of the things that’ll get you killed. You'll never look at a service corridor the same way again.

 

- Anthony Morris 

Review: The Mandalorian and Grogu

You don't have to be a box office expert to know that the only movies people are currently leaving their homes to see are the movies that offer them something they can't get at home. Which is not great news for The Mandalorian and Grogu, a movie that's literally just an extended episode of a television series that already looks like a halfway decent movie.

The flip side, of course, is that it's the return of the Star Wars franchise to the big screen after seven or so years of struggle on television. And it really does feel like Star Wars, in that it's a fairly episodic string of adventures featuring loads of creatures and decent action tied together by an overarching plot that leads to a big "good versus evil" climax. There's even X-Wing fighters!

So while it's hardly a must see (though it does look good in IMAX if that's an option), it is a fun time at the movies. There's no real backstory required either if you're coming in cold: Mando (the voice and sometimes body of Pedro Pascal) and baby yoda Grogu are badasses for hire who are currently working with the now-victorious rebels (this is set after Return of the Jedi) cleaning up the galaxy by bringing in Imperial holdouts.

After a solid all-action opening that establishes their kick-arse credentials, they're given a mission by their boss and paymaster Ward (Sigourney Weaver) that's a little more complicated than most. To track down an extra evil former Imperial officer (important point: nobody knows what he looks like), they have to get his location from a pair of Hutts (as in Jabba the Hutt) who will only help out if their nephew Rotta is rescued and brought back to them.

So our heroes have to head off to a very cyberpunk-ish city on a small moon, where crime rules the streets and the Hutt they're looking for is being held by a local crime boss who runs a death sport operation. After some entertaining information gathering involving a bar fight and an offer Mando can refuse, they find Rotta the Hutt (Jeremy Allen White). Twist number one: he's fighting of his own free will (and getting swole doing it) as a way to renounce his family's criminal heritage - he's the son of Jabba, and his relatives want him dead to claim the family business.

Things only get more complicated from there, mostly in ways that involve fighting monsters, stormtroopers, and droids. There's nothing here that's truly stand-out - the action is good and well thought out but not amazing, while the story keeps the pace up and the stakes relatively low - but it does all flow together well to create a satisfying, if never outstanding, whole.

Pascal does some great voice acting here, and his affection for Grogu really comes through. Grogu is a puppet most of the time, but a cute one (and the way most of his Force-jumping scenes are clearly just someone throwing a doll around is fun). Considering they're a guy in an expressionless helmet and a muppet with maybe three expressions, they're a great team to watch. 

It's very much a kid-friendly space western, which is what 85% of all Star Wars movies and series should be. As far as human drama goes, for long stretches of this film there aren't even human faces on the screen. It's in no way essential viewing: it feels like exactly the kind of film parents take their half interested kids to, and then spend the next week explaining that no, they're not going to go see it again. 

A long time ago, the Star Wars brand was strong enough to sell pretty much anything. Now it has to earn an audience just like everyone else. This feels like a back-to-basics acknowledgement of that reality. But in a world where you can get this kind of thing at home, a trip to the cinema might as well be a galaxy far, far away.

- Anthony Morris